White House: Cheney did not back simluated drowning

President Bush said on Friday the United States does not condone torture after Vice President Dick Cheney agreed with a questioner this week that a “dunk in water” for terrorism suspects might be useful.

Cheney was asked on Tuesday by a conservative radio host from Fargo, North Dakota: “Would you agree a dunk in water is a no-brainer if it can save lives?”

“Well, it’s a no-brainer for me,” Cheney replied.

If Cheney says that “a dunk in the water is a no-brainer if it can save lives,” then how can he not support “simulated drowning,” more commonly called waterboarding?

His comment prompted complaints from human rights advocates that he was endorsing a technique called “waterboarding” that simulates drowning and is considered torture by some critics.

Now for my favorite part: quoting Wikipedia.

Waterboarding is a method of torture used in coercive interrogations or for punishment. In modern practice it simulates drowning and produces a gag reflex, making the subject believe his or her death is imminent while ideally not causing permanent physical damage.

If you’re convinced that your interrogators are intent on drowning you, and they practically are, you’re what the CIA calls “intimidated.” You’re afraid for your life. You’re not merely being questioned; you’re being tortured.

“If Iran or Syria detained an American, Cheney is saying that it would be perfectly fine for them to hold that American’s head under water until he nearly drowns, if that's what they think they need to do to save Iranian or Syrian lives,“ said Tom Malinowski, Washington advocacy director for Human Rights Watch.

Perhaps neocon citizens—not the politicians—really do need the tables figuratively reversed in order to see the problem with their methods.

“This country doesn't torture. We’re not going to torture. We will interrogate people we pick up off the battlefield to determine whether or not they’ve got information that will be helpful to protect the country,” Bush said.

The United States doesn’t torture, and yet it does. Sheer brilliance: Tell the people that torture isn’t torture, and voila!—you aren’t torturing anymore.

White House spokesman Tony Snow insisted that U.S. officials do not talk publicly about interrogation techniques because they are classified.

“The vice president didn’t make any comments about waterboarding,” Snow said at a contentious morning briefing.

Come on, Mr. Snow. What else is a “dunk in the water” but waterboarding?

He shrugged off Cheney’s answer to what Snow dismissed as a “loosely worded question.”

“Loosely worded,” eh? Like I said immediately above, what else is a “dunk in the water” but waterboarding? Going for a midsummer swim with CIA agents?

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